Sheep City

It is a very funny feeling when you wake up one day to discover that your pair of shoes have gone missing from the front door. It is even weirder that a pair of flip-flops too have made the same disappearance along with the shoes. What’s the deal, baby?

I wondered if Singaporeans have become so poor as to resort to stealing shoes and slippers. Maybe they cannot no longer afford a decent pair. Maybe the inflation, rising costs, unemployment and the relentless torrent of foreign talents have made lives so untenable which compelled the local folk to resort to stealing. Wait? It is really? Could it be the work untalented aliens? But who knew? Mas Selamat?

I checked and discovered that my older pair of Hush Puppies were left untouched. The newer ones were the intended target. How disconcerting! At least take the older pair lah! I wouldn’t have objected! I could even throw in a pair of socks in the act of charity.

But the slippers? Why take the slippers too? 

Alas I have no answer. For a moment there I breathed a sigh of relief that I discovered this thievery earlier. If it had been on a lousy Morning morning, then it would be very alarming. 

Hush Puppies are a nice brand of shoes that I’d like to wear. They are very comfortable and the shoes make my feet feel happy. Now I could almost hear my feet moan at this loss. They will not wear the older pair. Within the fraction of time where I breathed a sigh of relief, I was quite angry and actually cursed the thief with gangrene and hope that his feet gets rotten and have to be amputated. Now that I have regained my wits and an astute sense of direction, I retract my hideous curse. 

Why it happened- my fault since I was the complacent bastard that deliberately left the shoes outside the house. I should know that Singaporeans are getting desperate and the poor are rising in numbers. What to do to prevent this from recurring in the future is simply putting them in the shoe-rack inside the house. Problem solved. Poor folks have to steal shoes, I told myself repeatedly, lame bastard generals seizing aid and putting their names on the boxes. I went back to my room and meditated.

So now you know what to do when your shoes are stolen. Just look back and reflect on our wise prime minister had said some time ago:

What to do- it’s happened.